Ticket 2 Ride

The proverbial question: if you had to be one or the other, would you rather be miserably hot or shivering cold? My school chums would answer: cold, because you put on more clothes. Rational response from a 12-year old. Not this 12-year old, but the brain trust of Lawrence Avenue would pile on more clothes rather than shed them.

One can die of heatstroke or hypothermia, or being trapped in a room with an extended car warranty salesman.

When I started writing this it was winter here, mid February to be precise, the worst time of year, in my lengthy experience. Sub-freezing temperatures, snow that sits on the ground turning into dirty, jagged, gray ice, and darkness bookending the workday. Today, it’s a balmy 78 degrees F.

February cold gets beneath my skin, into the bones, and lingers into April. The cold I’ve experienced isn’t Siberia cold, or the cold the unhoused deal with living outside, or children whose parent(s) must decide between housing, food, winter wear or heat. That’s a different kind of cold: bleak, inhumane, damnable. It’s now mid-April and my bone marrow is warm again. In fact, the A/C is on. A cold drink would be nice. But I digress.

The memories.

The coldest times were in my youth, although as a senior, I hate it even more now. As a kid, my body never warmed. Walking to and from school each day, playing outside in the snow, my shoes and mittens always soaked, and always chilled. Hard times? It may have felt like it then, but more fortunate than many.

[Last night the wife and I were watching a television show that takes place in northern Canada. Nothing about the snow or cold looked appealing.]

Even now, the November chill is invigorating, though not when it falls as rain. Early November reminds me of the Thanksgivings of my youth. A four-day weekend, then other holidays from school follow, and then my birthday. Why are birthdays allowed during winter months? So unfair, but that’s a complaint for another time. After Christmas, I can’t see a use for winter. Those months just take up space on the calendar.

Cold, what is it good for?

Exposure to prolonged cold can bring on confusion and poor decision-making, even a sense of euphoria and acting in a counterintuitive manner. Much like a college student on a Friday night.

Medically, Dr. Haitham Khraishah, a preventive cardiologist, says the body is programmed to save the major organs first, when the body has depleted its internal heat. “Blood is moving away from the periphery to this area, which is why fingers and toes get cold,” Khraishah said. According to the American Heart Association: “Blood vessels constrict to prevent heat loss and to keep more blood around the body’s core. Extreme cold also may cause blood to thicken and become more prone to clotting, which likewise raises the risk of heart attack and stroke.”

Side note: I like ice in my beverages (with the exception of beer and wine), but prefer drinking water at room temperature. Isn’t that odd? I enjoy pizza and chicken both cold as leftovers. I prefer my food warm, but not nuclear hot. Temperature is a funny thing.

Yet, cold is a temptress. Slowly, the body numbs, embracing what cold offers, the mind downshifting, sleep begging to be let in. In the summer, I welcome sleep, no begging required. I sleep better if the room is slightly cold, and I have a sheet or light spread over me.

Intense heat makes me physically sick, it always has. I have memories of riding around with my grandfather in a truck on summer days as he delivered fuel to farmers. This was before air conditioning was standard equipment; the humid, sweltering heat sucking my body dry of any moisture. By evening, I had a severe headache and was throwing up. My grandmother would say, “he’s not doing that anymore!” But I did.

Still, I do prefer the heat of the summer, just in moderation. Icarus I’m not.

Learning to like it.

The body can acclimate to climate. Not mine, but other people. Tolerance is learned, and practiced. Again, not me.

The cold burns my skin now
Epidermal defense hacked
It’s a seasonal brand
Wind-burned and cracked

For centuries, people have lived and survived in desert areas, as well as the arctic. According to Science Focus magazine, Araouane, Mali is the warmest place on Earth where people live, with an average summer temperature of 114.8°F. Death Valley, California has the hottest recorded temperature, at a place called Furnace Creek, with a temp of 134°F. The coldest populated place is Oymyakon, Russia, with an average winter temperature of -58°F. Other places such as the Antarctica’s East Antarctic Plateau, drops below -133.6°F.

Winter takes much more mental conditioning, especially as one ages. Stiff muscles, aching joints, respiratory infections. And the snow. Awkward and dangerous travel. Who needs it?

Final thought.

If global warming is indeed real, the hot or cold question may be irrelevant. With warmer winters, I can get rid of those heavy coats. I wonder if we can return the snowblower we purchased this year.