Ticket 2 Ride

Fifty years ago this month, I graduated from high school and stood before the world, wondering – now what?

The world looked much different 50 years ago. Vietnam was finally ending, Watergate had passed, inflation was a problem and gas shortages would cause anger at OPEC crude oil dependence, but overall, life was pretty darn good.

I was on my way to college, which luckily for me, was right in my hometown, actually just blocks from where we lived. At 18, you stare into your future with high beam headlights, anxiously taking your first step toward your dreams.

Fifty years later, we look back and wonder, where did time go? I’m retire now, but I remember those days of future past, wondering – Is this the right major to base my career? Can I make a living? Will I be happy? What if I guess wrong?

For some, life unfolds in a linear journey, a map followed or an organized, planned set of chapters that logically followed one another. Others of us zigged and zagged, going off-road and sometimes unsure of the path. We might have changed careers, faced dead-ends, gone sideways, but we figured it out.

Some people know with certainty their first steps into the future, like stepping stones in a pond, taking you confidently into a new experience. You trust the firmness under your feet. It took me awhile to find that path, but I did. Each step built upon the last.

Did any of us change the world or move the needle on science, medicine, the arts or reduce human suffering? That’s a pretty tall order. Maybe we served our communities, educated or mentored children, created job opportunities, increased the healthiness of those in need, or simply spread love and practice civility. Changing the world is a difficult outcome to quantify.

We leave the nest with the greatest of intentions. Eager to plunge into life, to experience everything, to drink it all in; to see how long our stride, to stretch beyond our reach, to lasso the brightest star in the heavens. Or to simply find the right current and move to the speed of our dreams.

In the past couple of months I’ve seen death notices for three of my high school classmates, people I actually knew better years after high school, when most of us had spread our wings and cast our own shadow, instead of standing in one.

These passings hit me harder than normal, not because we were best friends or that I fear of my own mortality, rather because life can end so abruptly, giving us little time to enjoy the benefits earned upon retirement. Our high school reunion is in a matter of weeks, perhaps that’s another reason I’m reflecting and looking at life.

Three years ago I retired, thankfully the stars aligned that I could do so in a comfortable situation, although some of the events were personally challenging. That’s the wonderment of life, a sweet scented rose with thorns and pollen. Stop and smell it, yada, yada, yada. Not terribly original, but part of the life cycle.

Fifty years ago I had more questions than answers. Do we get those questions answered along the way or do new questions replace the old ones? The more I think I know, the less certain I am that I’ve figured it out. What’s it all about, Alfie?